Ujjawal has realized now that he is in love. I have always been in love – but the euphoria is over. I had come to IIFM with a completely different mindset – one teetering more on dreams than what it actually offers. Not that the dreams have shattered – they still form a core of my everyday life, but are dormant. I now know where exactly IIFM can take me… if I only want it… if I only work for it – the destination is ahead, but what about the journey?
This one year has taught me a hell lot of things (keeping awake till late, for instance – I used to call it a day by 10 p.m.!). But the best part of this has been that I have not been taught – I have learnt. And to me, it is a very significant difference. Always the one to question things not understood by me, I have worn my audacity on my sleeves – to not-so-rosy effects. Like the day I was chosen Principal of my school for Teachers’ Day, and I went to school wearing a trendy sleeveless t-shirt just because I was tired of all the ‘official’ stuff (already!), and the teachers were so appalled, they turned dumb with shock – they just stared at me, and didn’t say a word.
IIFM has always been close to my heart – and I wish to experience each and every part of it personally. I make night visits to places I find interesting. Every night, I want to sleep in a different place, just to make it a part of me. But again, ‘society’ stops me – literally. And I am dragged back to the mundane. Why do I allow this? Where are the dreams which drove me? Am I digressing, or am I mainstreaming?
Moot questions all… and for now, I am just content – content doing my own thing, my own way, remaining inconspicuous to the world at large. Not for me the attention… what draws me near is the strange…
–Siddharth Iyer (PFM ’09)
